Why I’m Deleting My Facebook Account
Facebook: the biggest advertising company and personal information database in history.
I’m deleting my Facebook account. Why? Facebook doesn’t value individual privacy, and and it’s reached a tipping point where I don’t feel that the value I attain from the service is worth the personal information I’m forced to give up. Facebook uses its facial recognition software, PhotoDNA, to scan every photo you upload & cross-reference it against a criminal database. Every face tag adds to a massive repository of data about our faces. Our personal data is mined, traded, sold, and swapped, making anonymity harder and identity theft easier. And no, deleting things & setting strict privacy settings isn’t enough: Facebook stores massive databases of “deleted” information on its servers. In 1 week from my writing this, they’re forcing all users to adopt Timeline.
Facebook isn’t free: you pay for it, knowingly or unknowingly, with your valuable personal data. But you have choices:
- Support websites & companies that *do* value free speech, anonymity, and privacy
- Use tracker-blocking software
- Don’t give out your real name and info unless you absolutely have to
- Use services like Tor to anonymize your IP when you’re browsing
You can always find me on FetLife, Twitter, and via email (Raven@FreedomOfFetish.com)., sites that have shown a dedication to individual privacy.
I want to live in a world where I can be who I want, and I can’t do that without privacy. If you’re the same way, get the hell out of there, too.
Freedom of Fetish Episode 36: Mia Martina is back to talk about A Year of Sex & your naughty questions
Episode 36.0: In which Raven speaks with podcaster and smut writer Mia Martina about her new book, A Year of Sex, and answers your open relationship and sex party questions. Check out Mia at AYearOfSex.com, or find her podcast, I Want Your Sex, on iTunes.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
Mia Martina wants your sex.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 35: Answering your questions with comedian Ted Steier
Episode 35: In which Raven and her guest, standup comedian Ted Steier, discuss (and make fun of) a whole slew of kinky questions, including breaking the fart barrier, feeder/gainer fetish, and more. Here’s to taking things a little less seriously. You can find Ted at http://tedsteier.com.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
Mr. Ted Steier himself.
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Crossdressing like a Hot Rich Girl and Toying with Boys
Hi Raven:
I would like to crossdress like a young rich woman and have the whole persona of one. Could give me any advice on how a young rich woman would control her unruly husband or boyfriend? Would you recommend physical restraining and whipping?
-Anonymous from Formspring
Of course I thought of Paris the Heiress when I read your question.
Princess Kali and I answered this somewhat on Episode 34 of Freedom of Fetish. Upon reflection, though, I don’t think we got into it in the level of detail we should have, so I’m going to expand here. The main point to understand about this type of domination is that it’s about what YOU want. Clearly you have a fantasy about this, and it sounds like a pretty specific fantasy. You need to find ways to enact what’s in your head with a consenting partner, preferably one who shares the fantasy or its defining elements. Who ‘s the young, rich woman in your head? How does she dress? How does she treat the people around her? How does she talk? What tone of voice does she have? How would she treat a potential partner? What makes her tick? Think about these things and create a character. You can even give her a name, and she’ll come out as your hot rich girl alter-ego.
I can’t tell you how she’ll control her unruly husband or boyfriend. The way she’ll do that is up to you; it’ll have to fit your perception of her fantasy character. I can give you my sense of how it’d go for *me* with the caveat that I don’t think it’s particularly relevant for how *you’ll* want to proceed. Like I said above, the most important element here is fantasy self-fulfillment. In the description below, picture yourself as the woman, and the “you” as whoever your lucky partner is.
The type of control I associate with a young, rich female is more mental than physical: she’ll bend you to her will because she has the power of her beauty and her wallet. She knows you want to fuck her, and she knows you’ll do just about anything to do it. She always gets what she wants. And to top it off, she’s immune to your money. You can’t just buy her a present or write her a check. She’s got it already. She wants something more: to humiliate you; to belittle you; to make you beg; to turn you into a personal toy; to make you just another object that you’ll be lucky for her to play with before she throws you away for something better. How do you please the girl who has it all? You have to give her everything.
One particularly fun aspect of this fantasy is how well it lends itself to public play, assuming you’re comfortable with crossdressing in public. Any stereotypical date activity can be twisted and warped into a power exchange. Dinner and a movie? She picks dinner; she orders for you; she’s incredibly picky about what she gets; she makes a point of making you feel bad for not paying; she drags you to a chick flick; she teases you in the theater without giving you any release; she ignores you after the credits roll; she demands you drive her wherever she wants to go…the list goes on. As long as you have a consenting partner, the possibilities are endless.
However you decide to craft your heiress alter ego, have fun with it and stay true to what originally attracted you to the idea. Good luck!
Freedom of Fetish Episode 34: Princess Kali of Kink Academy, Humiliation, Complimenting a Woman, Labels, & More
Episode 34.0: In which Raven and her guest, Princess Kali of KinkAcademy.com and PassionateU.com, talk about humiliation, aluminum toys, how to compliment a woman, crossdressing, BDSM labels, and Kink Academy.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
Princess Kali is the headmistress of Kink Academy. This is the most fun you'll have at school, guaranteed.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 33: Queen/Knight D/s, Tips for Newbie Dommes, Potential Asexuality, & Mental Abuse Kink
Episode 33: In which Raven talks lady/knight D/s, resources for newbie dominatrixes, potential asexuality, & mental abuse kink.
Want to win a 1-year subscription to KinkAcademy.com? In 100 words or less, tell me why you need a year of online kink education. Email Raven at FreedomofFetish dot com. The best entry gets the goods.
Sometimes it pays to lose.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 32: Crossdresser Camming, Combating Condom Droop, Kinky Scenes in Mainstream Movies, and More
Episode 32.0: In which Raven tells you how to pick out the real kinksters from the posers, talks to a crossdresser about his camming and sexuality issues, examines “condom droop,” advises a domme on how to get her wimpy boyfriend to man the fuck up, and lists your recommendations for best kink scenes in mainstream movies and TV.
Maleficent is a total dominatrix, and this picture proves it.
The outtro song for this episode is The Toadies – Possum Kingdom.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 31: Ageplay & ABDL with Mako & Spacey
Episode 31: In which Raven asks Mako and Spacey of The Big Little Podcast all your ABDL (adult baby, diaper lover) and ageplay questions. Part 2/2. You can find part 1 over on The Big Little Podcast, Episode 15, or just click here: http://www.biglittlepodcast.com/2011/05/episode-15-questions-from-freedom-of-fetish/
The outtro music this week is “Slave” by Tritonal.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 30: Pegging, Kink Discrimination, Drag Queens, First FetLife Messages, & Crazy Bloodplay
Episode 30.0: In which Raven answers whether pegging makes you gay (hint: no), finding unique porn, attractions to drag queens, discrimination based on kink, psychotic bloodplay, & first FetLife messages.
Drag queen Raven, of RuPaul's Drag Race fame, has at least a few straight girls pining after her
The outtro this week is “Pretty with the Lights Off” by Megan Jean and the KFB.
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, you can reach the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to Raven@FreedomOfFetish.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring at http://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
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Freedom of Fetish Episode 29: Kink Shame & Divisive Issues in the Kink Community
Episode 29.0: In which Raven discusses being ashamed of your kinks, preserving your privacy in the scene, divisive issues in the fetish community, and post-sex guilt.
The outtro music for this episode is Rihanna featuring Britney Spears – S&M (Remix).
To leave a voicemail for the podcast, Skype Raven at FreedomOfFetish or leave a message at the Freedom of Fetish voicemail at (860) 756-0308.
To contact Raven in writing, send your questions to FreedomOfFetish@gmail.com, tweet her @FreedomOfFetish or @RavenLightholme, or visit the Freedom of Fetish formspring athttp://www.formspring.me/FreedomOfFetish.
Masks: a hot way to preserve your kink privacy. Fidelio?
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